Tuesday, September 1, 2015

My 54th Birthday Weekend

I turned 54 on August 23. I like to do special things for myself for a few days, sometimes a week. When I turned 50, it was my birthday month! 
I never wait for anyone to do things for me, I'm single right now and I like celebrating my self.
In my family birthdays were always celebrated. My mom would make my favourite cake, it was homemade angel food with brown sugar icing, yum! My birthday flower is the gladiola and my mom would always pick one from her garden and place it in the middle.
Being gluten free, angel food is out of the picture now, I still love thinking about the memories.
When I really think about being 54, it's hard for me to fathom, time has gone by so quickly! I know my birth certificate says 54 and so does my drivers license, inside I feel 30 something.
I've had my challenges in life, as we all have, and I always refocus on the positive and having a great attitude. I don't allow myself to stay in a negative space for long, although I have had times of depression which I have shared here on my blog.
I feel blessed to be 54 and reflect on my life, I feel blessed to have lived a beautiful, amazing life to this point. I'm grateful for every experience and person I have shared time with.

Gracefully embracing the aging process can be difficult for some. 
I decided to let my hair return to it's natural colour this year, and I now see the grey. I look at my grey hair and the lines on my face as a privilege. They are a gift of a life lived. They reflect some of what I have experienced.
I used Botox for about two years when I was 45. I dated a man who always wanted me to look younger. At one point he suggested a face lift and breast implants, suggesting, I could look 35 and really beautiful. At 5'4" and 112 pounds he felt I should have better abs and hired a personal trainer to work with me. 
Needless to say, the relationship was stressful and when I ended it, I decided to be me and not listen to anyone about how I should look or things I could do to slow down the aging process. 
When I see women who's lips are distorted because of fillers, puffy cheeks, and faces that barely show expression, I feel sad for them. Or, women with a lot of makeup on, in my opinion it makes them look older.
I wish they could see their real beauty. I wish they could learn to love the woman in the mirror. Most of all, I wish they could love the woman they are inside. When you love your own beautiful heart, it glows from the inside out.
Perhaps I'm fortunate in the aging process and blessed with good family genes. 
I believe a large part of it is attitude, being optimistic and being grateful for the life I have lived to this point. Smile, laugh, learn, love. Life is amazing, if you let it be...
Friday August 21

Saturday August 22

Just woke up August 23